Alrighty. I’ve been gone due to some technical issues on my end (yay for switching Internet providers!), but it’s just as well. I’ve been having some body issues.
Usually, my body issues last for about a day or so. Not this time. This Bad Body Day has been festering for the better part of two weeks. It’s pretty much healed now, but damn, y’all, what a doozy.
I can’t even place where this one came from. It might have been the impending bridesmaid’s gown purchase. It might have been clothes browsing with mom. I don’t know. But one morning, as I’m preparing for my daily workout, it slapped me in the forehead: ooh! If you keep this up, and reduce some of that food you’ve been eating, you can totally take 20lbs off! Just in time for that dress fitting!
*record scratch noise* What? Where in the mauve hell did THAT come from?!
I haven’t thought like that for the better part of 4 months or so, so it disturbed me enough to call a temporary suspension of working out. Now, I know, for some people it would have made more sense to continue working out, strengthening the body, and showing oneself that yes, one’s body is fine. I’m a bit odd in that aspect, however. If I were to do that, I would have subconsciously started restricting, lengthening workout times, recording what I ate and how much of it, and it all would have dissolved into FOR THE LOVE OF BISCUITS AND GRAVY, do you have ANY IDEA how many calories are in that lemon wedge you want to put in my glass of water?!
Ahem. Sorry. Yeah. See, my diet-mind is a touch hyperactive. And I wasn’t about to entertain that.
I decided, once I got my Internet back, to go through the fatosphere and catch up, filling my brain with delicious food for thought. And this morning, I rolled over and heard bones pop.
Me: Ouch!
Body: Yep. I need to move today, girl. I don’t know what you and your Diet-Mind have going on, but I need some exercise over here.
Me: But, but–
Body: ENOUGH. It’s enough now. You know and I know I have no earthly intentions of losing any weight. Now, go pick a DVD so we can MOVE already. Frankenstein’s Monster has more fluidity than I do right now!
Me: Ok, ok. So, what do you feel like doing? Oh, how about this: Pure Sweat! Let’s do that!
Body: Um, I haven’t moved in TWO WEEKS. I want to be stretched, not broken. Let’s do the Just My Size Yoga.
Me: Sounds great.
So I stretched. And breathed. And moved. And meditated. And you know what? I’m still on that quest to find body nirvana, but I feel like I might have experienced what it’ll feel like when I get there.
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