Addendum: Kell’s post has since been taken down. But I am going to leave my post up because I want folks to be able to discuss how they feel about what she had to say as well as what I had to say. I do want to add, however, please be respectful towards Kell in your comments–disagree, but do NOT be an ass about it because I will delete you.
Damn. Just when I was settling into the Fat Acceptance movement, I get word that my presence is no longer wanted.
Before I get to why I was put out the movement, let me share how I got here.
Bored one day, I managed to find Kate Harding on a visit to Elastic Waist. Kate’s views inspired me to start a blog of my own (and was the first comment I ever had!) I love the sense of community on her blog, and I’m hoping to spread more of that feeling here.
I perused the archives and looked forward to new posts, as I do every day. One day, I came across a guest blogger that made me cry and think all at once. Wonderful, wonderful Heidi, who has recently had weight-loss surgery (WLS), wrote about how much she loathed the procedure that she felt was going to save her life. The comments were a mix of encouragement and gratitude. And, as always, there are folks who disagreed with Heidi’s decision (very respectfully, even). And I thought about Heidi’s situation. Now, while I am NOT a fan of diets or WLS, I do support PEOPLE who want to lose weight.
Pause. Let that sink in a second. Ok, now I’ll explain.
I tend to think of diets as a sign of all that is wrong in the world. Folks can’t be happy as they are, so they look to that “silver bullet” that will help them be happy with themselves. For fat people, it’s about their weight. Diets don’t help people work on self-esteem, in my opinion. And from what I’ve investigated, they don’t work at all, either. Diets don’t change who a person is, they change what a person looks like. WLS is about the same way. However, we live in a world of choices, and while I may not like diets or WLS, I will support ANYONE who decides that this is what works best for them.
And this goes double for Heidi. Because I always believe there are exceptions to the rule. Yes, WLS is over-prescribed for folks who want to lose weight. But it’s one thing to do it because of vanity, and a whole other thing to do it because you feel absolutely trapped in your body. This is the distinction for me. And while I feel sad that Heidi had to do this, I understand she had to do this–for HER health, HER peace of mind, and HER quality of life. And I respect that and wish her a speedy recovery.
What I don’t appreciate is being told that I am supporting a “suicide” because I am supporting someone going through life-altering surgery. I don’t appreciate being told that I can’t be for Fat Acceptance because I support a PERSON going through life altering changes. And I for damn sure don’t appreciate being told that I’m “worshipping death” through my support. Because, you see, supporting the PERSON has absolutely shit to do with supporting the PROCEDURE. Apparently, this is a distinction that has been missed–or not adequately shown.
Now, I don’t purport to know more about the Movement than folks who have been in it longer. I’ve said this before…I am a baby FA writer. I’m all of 22–I’m still learning myself. But I find it hard to believe that supporting a young WOMAN(again, NOT the procedure) excludes me from the Movement.
And if it does, then I’ll take that. I’m banished from some folks’ idea of Fat Acceptance. I’m ok with that. I like MY form of FA, where I (and, dammit, everyone else) cannot be lambasted for supporting PEOPLE in their endeavors, where I can rant about blatant fatism in the media and real life, and where I can comically shred bogus obesity information.
And with that, I welcome myself BACK into the Movement. It’s good to be home.