Posts Tagged ‘Activism


Three Cheers for Rachel and Monique!

Addendum: If you haven’t gotten a chance to see the show, or forgot to DVR it, go here and take a peek. 

So, I just finished watching the Morning Show With Mike and Juliet segment with Rachel, Monique, random doctor A, and….MeMe Roth. Ugh.

There should totally be a rule that the person who speaks MeMe Roth’s name should take a shot of pure melted SALTED butter. Mmm. Butter. But I digress.

But on to the lovin’. Let me tell you, these two women were much calmer than I would have been in that situation. So, I listen to MR’s statistics. So…800 people a DAY die of fat? Cut to me with my mouth hanging open. I don’t remember reading that stat. Especially because the CDC only reports 30,000 folks a year dying of the fat. Now, I don’t do much by figurin’ and such, but 800 times 365 (or more, it’s a leap year) is a lot more than 30,000. I wonder where MR got her information from?

But that’s ok, cause Monique and Rachel handled it well. Especially when Rachel went into the tinkering of the bullshit that is the BMI. See, in 1998, they (and “they” refers to the powers that be that determine what healthy is, whomever that might be) lowered the “average” requirement so that millions of folks woke up the next morning with the “overweight” label glued to their foreheads.

But it isn’t even the technical stuff that had me flinging clean socks and expletives at my television. It was listening to MR spew foolishness like “If the title of the NY Times article had been ‘Thin is in, or At Least Accepted’, there would have been a public outcry!” or the wonderful “The Fat Acceptance movement has come to mean that ‘Fat is beautiful'” or the FUCKING RIDICULOUS “Fat is already accepted as the norm…”

Have mercy. I’m not sure where to start. Ok, yes I am. We’ll start at the beginning. As Vesta44 said in her critique (and I’ll add I got the stats above from her too–I told y’all, I don’t do much by figurin’ and such), there’s no need for a blatant statement of “Thin is In”. We see it every single day when reading magazines, watching television, web surfing….we are always bombarded by these images of overly thin, tanned, blazingly white-toothed individuals. In a day where the norm is considered unattainable, it feels good to have some folks to relate to. That’s all. And truth be told (and I know this has been discussed at length in other more prolific blogs than my own) thin people aren’t automatically excluded. Because the thin is in propaganda doesn’t just take its toll on fat folks. It takes its toll on skinny folks, in between folks, everybody. And MR has an issue with these folks coming together to rally against this norm that has been foisted upon us? Kiss my ass.

Now, as for the whole “Big is beautiful” component, yep, I’ll say it. BIG IS BEAUTIFUL. THIN IS BEAUTIFUL. A BELLY WITH DEFINED ABS TO A BELLY WITH ROLLS IS BEAUTIFUL. THIN THIGHS ARE GORGEOUS. THICK THIGHS ARE GORGEOUS. ANY SIZE BODY FROM SVELTE TO CUDDLY AND ROUND IS BEAUTIFUL. Get it now? What I rally against, as an FA supporter, is the ideal that beauty, acceptance, and health are all pigeonholed into the package of the thin, tanned, blonde haired and blue eyed woman. I mean, you can be a brunette or have brown eyes, but that means your body has to be THAT much more toned. What I fight for is a world where folks don’t qualify someone’s beauty or handsomeness to fit that glorified unattainable ideal. (She’s so pretty for a fat girl. He’s so handsome for a fat guy.) Again, if MR has an issue with that, she can kiss my ass.

Oh, and PLEASE leave that whole fat is already acceptable argument alone, dammit. If it were acceptable, folks wouldn’t have garbage thrown at them when they jog. Folks wouldn’t have to come up with responses to Fatty Drive-Bys. In fact, there would BE no fatty drive-bys at all if fat were acceptable. In fact, if it were ok to be at one with oneself, there would be no Extreme Makeover and such. So for the third time, MR can kiss my ASS.

Oh, and random doctor A? (I didn’t catch her name.) Alright. Why is she proposing a moratorium on white foods? I like potatoes, rice, bread, and the like. It tastes good. I also like brown rice and wheat bread. It also tastes good. I like to drink my calories sometimes, because juice is tasty. And if I want a soda (mmmm, cherry Coke) or Kool-Aid (mmmm, watermelon cherry), I’m gonna drink that too. Because it’s tasty. And as we all know, the quickest way to cause an obsession is to restrict one’s access to something. Even if it’s as asinine as a potato(barring those who have sensitivities to these foods, of course.)

As I’ve said, Rachel and Monique ROCKED today, especially up against MR and the doctor AND in such limited time. They did beautifully.

And I totally want their glasses. Cause they’re beautiful, too.


Deep Conversation

My best friend BuddingStarlet and I had a deep, meaningful conversation today. It’s no different from any other  deep conversation she and I tended to have, however, it was my mindset that was different somehow. Let me explain.

BuddingStarlet gave me a call on her way home from work tonight (per usual), and told me she saw her ex boyfriend near her place of employment. You see, when she calls and says the words “You know, I did something bad today…” it’s ALWAYS gonna be something, well, bad. And this ex cheated on her, left her for the other woman…and married said other woman. So one can imagine the level of pissed poor BuddingStarlet was when she saw the two of them together. Here’s the convo:

BuddingStarlet: “You know, I did something really bad today.” *giggle*

Me: “Oh, God. What did you do?”

She: “I saw PretentiousJackass (PJ)!”

Me: “I see this is going to be all bad. Ok, what happened?”

She: “Well, PJ and his wife were waddling down the walkway…”

Me: “Eh. Waddling? That’s not nice.”

She: “Well, it’s true! He has gained serious weight since we broke up. And that wife of his can’t even fit in Lane Bryant clothes anymore. Anyway, I saw them as they walked in the store. So I went in to tell PJ hello. He couldn’t even look me in the eye! I knew it was because he was ashamed of himself–for cheating on me and for his weight. And you know, on the inside, I felt, well, a bit happy about it.”

Me: “But I’m fat. And you’re still not right for the waddling thing.”

She: “But YOU’RE not as fat as they are! That’s like comparing apples to oranges!”

Yeah. She said it. All I could do was put a hand to my head and listen to her rant a bit. Then she asked if I thought she was a horrible person for feeling that twinge of self-satisfaction. And since y’all don’t know me well: when I’m asked a straightforward question, I give a straightforward answer. I answered yes. And instead of getting really pissed (like I would if, say, a troll had told me the exact same thing), I rationally outlined why I was so disturbed. I explained the concept of Fat Acceptance (FA) and told her that, you know, you can’t take pleasure in something like this. And it’s definitely not right to proclaim “But you’re not that fat!” as if it’s gonna make what you just said any less hurtful. Because I am fat, and saying that is like…what? “Take heart, you’re not that big! It could always be worse!” That does not make it better. And being big does not make anybody less than anyone else…even if you’ve done some nasty shit. Karma is law. Don’t fuck up YOUR karma because someone else doesn’t know how to act.

And what happens next is why she is my best friend.

She took my arguement, and said she understood she was wrong (in fact, in the midst of our convo, she outright acknowledged she was wrong and that she knew better). She even apologized to me for the “not that fat” statement. I suppose it wasn’t so much the conversation that was so deep rather than the conversion that I’d had. Because months ago, before I found out about the FA movement, I would have been giggling right along with her. I would have been like…”Word? You right, I’m NOT that big!” and kept it moving. But as she spoke…I couldn’t laugh. Even though PJ is well, an idiot and is absolutely wrong for what he did to BuddingStarlet, in my mind I knew the whole thing was wrong. And I’ve changed, grown, and learned–moreso every day. And I know my dear BuddingStarlet has learned and grown too. And our convo didn’t turn into a screaming match because we’re intelligent enough to speak like grown folks.

And so my tale has a happy ending. Shucks, sometimes I wish other folks could be as understanding (and rational) as my best friend is.

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